The Top 10 things I thought about the 2013 Oscars

I’ll have a list of all the Oscar winners in a bit, but here’s a few random thoughts about this year’s edition:

Halle Berry's 2013 Oscars dress10. Halle Berry saying that the James Bond franchise was the one she’s most proudest to be a part of despite only appearing in one Bond film compared to the three X-Men films she’s starred in and yet thinking she got it completely right.

9. That completely awkward guessing game of trying to figure out what was going on with poor Renee Zellweger.

8. Wondering how few groups Seth MacFarlane had left on his “Who can I offend now?” list by the time the show ended. I’ve gotta figure there was very little white space left on his board.

Daniel Radcliffe and Kristen Stewart, Harry Potter meets Bella from Twilight at 2013 Oscars7. The collective gasp from all of nerddom passing out when worlds collided. Otherwise known as Harry Potter presenting an award with “Twilight’s” Bella. And I loved how refreshingly nervous Daniel Radcliffe was the entire time. Hopefully you’ll have lots of practice attending these shows Danny.

6. Loving the moment seconds after both my parents remarked on how classy Meryl Streep is she proceeded to commence “Operation: Remove Wedgie.” Classy indeed. And what’s the etiquette for shaking hands with someone when you see them fixing a wedgie?

5. While Adele rightfully won the Oscar for Best Original song for “Skyfall,” Jennifer Hudson had the night’s best performance and reminded everyone why she won a Best Supporting Actress Oscar in 2007. And I’m telling you, we still love you.

Kristen Stewart on crutches at 2013 Oscars4. That amazing realization that Kristen Stewart’s painkillers stopped working a minute before she hobbled on stage and she forgot her crutches. Worse, she also forgot her comb. There’s some celebrities like Jennifer Garner who you seem so unaffected by the whole Hollywood deal that you get that they’re not so wrapped up in it, but then there’s stars like Stewart who look like they put so much effort into being “above it all” that they seem like they’re still acting. Or maybe she was just wiped out from celebrating “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 2” winning seven (undeserved IMO) Razzies?

Jennifer Lawrence falls at the 2013 Oscars3. That of all the colossal egos in Hollywood there’s about a mere 5% that could handle the indignity of falling on their face after receiving the biggest honor of their career. Fortunately for all of us, Jennifer Lawrence is among that percentile and thankfully could care less about “acting” like a celebrity. Before her career is wrapped what do we figure the odds of her becoming the next Meryl Streep, i.e. the gold standard of female acting excellence?

2. This may have been the first time in the history of the event that celebrities were thinking there was a better Oscars party that they weren’t going to be able to attend.  #PartyattheWhite House with FLOTUS! Still trying to confirm rumors that Mrs. Obama stayed at the White House so she wouldn’t upstage the celebrities. Michelle Obama FLOTUS announcing 2013 Oscar for Best Picture

1. That while it seemed like a foregone conclusion that Anne Hathaway, Daniel Day-Lewis and Ben Affleck would be the big winners, how they all managed to surprise us with heartfelt emotion, some surprisingly witty humor and maturity in receiving their awards. Personally, if I were Affleck I would have found some way to get a dig in about not being nominated for Best Director by saying “This is the speech I had prepared for being named Best Director, but since I wasn’t nominated, I figured I’d use it here…” He is truly a better man than me.

Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner 2013 Oscars